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It is the end of the world as we know it …

Published March 19th, 2020 by Bobby Henderson

and I feel frustrated.

Frustrated at the government response, at the mis-information and propaganda surrounding the crisis, and at the few people taking advantage of the situation.

A few thoughts about the CoronaVirus pandemic:

It is serious: please follow the recommendations of the science community and health professionals. [Even though we Pastafarians are suspicious of “science”, better safe than sorry on this one.]

Pastafarian top tips for reducing the spread of the CoronaVirus:

  • Practice social distancing
  • Stay home if you can
  • Wash your hands
  • Dont excessively touch stranger’s faces and/or groins (the face of the pelvis)
  • Pirate-bandana can be used as a face-mask in a pinch but it is not ideal
  • Avoid social gatherings, yes even Church.

If I can shame a few reilgious leaders for a moment

I don’t want to talk shit about other religious leaders, and I’m not even saying most, or even many, religious groups are handling this crisis wrong … but some religious leaders are being so wildy irresponsible I’d like to mention them:

Maybe you’d like to sow a $91 seed.” Here’s Paula White, head of the White House’s Faith and Opportunity Initiative, selling spiritual protections against the coronavirus.

Here’s TeleEvangelist Kenneth Copeland curing his viewers of the virus through the television. I can’t stress this enough: do not under any circumstances touch this man’s hands.

TV Pastor Jim Bakker says his Silver Solution elixer will cure you of the CoronaVirus. Looks like he may get in trouble for fraud (again) for this.

Here’s Jerry Falwell Jr on Fox & Friends pushing a conspiracy theory that the coronavirus is a plot by the Chinese and North Koreans. Falwell was forced to shut down classes at his Liberty University when the Virginia governor limited crowd sizes.

“We’re raising up revivalists, not pansies”. Here’s a pastor encouraging people to shake hands.

Enought of that.

What should the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster do to help? Please send me suggestions here in the comments, twitter (@henderob) or email. Thanks!